In the middle of the week, Toby was fishing with his cousin Marcus and saw a little boy whose name was Ollie coming down the hill. He walked over to us and asked if he was allowed to join in but we said “Have you asked your parents?”. He said yeah but I’ve never been fishing in my life. We said we would help him but when he tried to catch his first fish he managed to catch a stingray! Me and Marcus were so jealous we just wanted to walk off. But just before we were about to leave he got stung and he felt really ill. And we never saw him AGAIN …
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I really like the way you have started it
well done
come check out our Christmas special
https://longtownprimary.j2bloggy.com/Y5-100-Word-Challenge/100wcweek12-craig-and-jake-father-christmas-special/
well done . just saying that instead off starting your sentence with and you could start it with a adverb