It was time for my brother to go to bed because – it was his birthday in the morning. However, me and my mam and step dad were rushing about to get every thing ready for his 2nd birthday. I had the job of blowing all the balloons up, which they was 33, at the end I was puffed out! I was grateful that I got to help but it was tiring. I had like 2 glasses of water. He struggled to get to sleep because he was that excited . As we finished up, I could not sleep . The next day, it was frightening that he would hurt himself then he did by jumping of the couch and there was a balloon on the ground. They rushed him to the hospital and it was broken I felt so bad. It heeled within a week then we was up running again.
I think that your story was going good throughout, but it is lacking some punctuaution, and there has to be a bit more grammar.
A very nice story which sounds truthful. May be read over your work to correct the few errors. Well done!